Apple Head (Pre-Cert Home Entertainment)

This is the second, limited, vinyl-only release from Pre-Cert, the specialist sonic grave robbers. You can read about the first here. That was only 22mins long, but most music goes on way beyond the time it should have ended. Ornette’s ‘Free Jazz’ would be heard by more people if it was also 22mins long...on second thoughts, scrap that idea.
   Now Apple Head offer 24mins of music. They’re not generous, these guys, but I’m OK with that. Less is more or less always good, and it suits our low attention span era. Even a Twitter-brain could sit through this...possibly...well, one side at a time. If Apple Head were on Twitter I like to think they’d amass a million followers who they would lead into a room and torture with some ludicrous device involving blades, needles, and glass.
   This is less original than AK’s debut, which pulled off the miraculous stunt of sounding completely fresh (although with ‘A.Kirk’ printed under Mr Potato Head on the back sleeve there is some connection). Just who is responsible I don’t know, and don’t care much. It’s a secretive coven Up North...a gang of couch potato heads being drip-fed giallo films via VHS whilst sampling the soundtracks, probably.
   A few passages here feature woman speaking in Italian. She may be Italy’s answer to Fanny Craddock telling us how to make the most of gnocchi, but I doubt it. ‘Villa Scott’ sets the template for the longer pieces, and if you like Argento-style soundtracks, you’ll be Goblin’ it up – ha!
   And of course, in homage to Ennio, there has to be some stressed-out female wordless vocals, as in ‘Crepaxian Interligne’. Obvious? Yes, but that’s fine by me because they do it well. Gothic Organ? Why not – chuck that in too.
   Add to the mix a lot of subtle electrickery along with that trademark Carpenter percussive tick and you have a heavily referential but still satisfying trip through the sicko sound world. Now, I really should send this to my Italian friend for a translation.